Why Me?
by KuroNeko35
Summary: After a summer fling with his camp co-worker Naruto decides it's time to come out to his friends, but the realization that his summer fling now goes to school with him makes it that much harder. His new roommate and ridiculously demanding job don't seem to help much either. Pairings: [SasNarSas] Slight [NaruKyuu]


**A/N: I didn't have room in the summary, but this is a 'bit' of a gender bender/cross dressing fic. Naruto works at a maid cafe. Oops. I guess now that you've clicked on the story it wouldn't hurt to read it... you don't wanna waste a perfectly good click.  
Of course all 'rated M' sections will be Yaoi, they don't happen until later though. Have fun reading.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters.**

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 **Chapter 1: Short Staffed**

"Yo, earth to fox face, you there?"

No, I wasn't really and I really didn't want to be, but I had to keep up appearances. Looking up I smiled at my friend Kiba, "What have I told you about calling me fox face, dog breath?"

"Are you okay Naruto? You keep spacing out." Sakura asking interrupting the impending argument.

Sakura had always been perceptive to my moods. I mean, she should be, we dated for like 6 months in the 8th grade. As high school seniors it was long and forgotten by now, but the amount of time we spent together plus the fact that we had been having secret sex since the breakup meant she knew me a little bit better than everyone else. Leave it to her to notice when I was upset.

"I'm fine Sakura," I lied, "I just didn't get any sleep studying for that econ test thing today." Which was sorta true. I had been up all night, but I had finished studying at 10. The rest of the night I had been lying in bed, wide awake, dreading today. Today is the day I decided to tell my friends that I am gay… or, judging by the quicky Sakura and I managed to fit in before class this morning, bisexual.

Right now we are sitting in gym class on the bleachers. Our gym teacher, Guy, is absent today. I think his wife is giving birth or something. So instead of actually doing anything, our substitute, Kakashi, allowed us to do whatever we want. So currently we were all sitting around the bleachers talking. Well, everyone except for Lee, but that guy was crazy so he hardly counted as the general population.

Sakura nodded knowingly, seeming to accept my explanation. Not the least bit suspicious. I felt a pang of guilt for lying to my friends again. It was now September, which means I had been holding this secret for almost four months now, ever since I had met _him_. I almost shuddered at the thought of him. Sasuke. The guy I had spent all of June fighting with, and eventually fucking with. By the end of the month I had been head over heels for the guy, but the dud number he gave me told me he didn't feel the same. Whatever. Fuck that guy. I had come home and immediately jumped in bed with Sakura.

I was brought back to reality when I heard Kiba groan loudy, "That test killed me. No, scratch that, my _parents_ are going to kill me when they see that grade."

Ino snickered, "Well of course you failed it, you're an idiot, and when we got together to study you spent the entire time on Naruto's PlayStation."

"I bet you didn't even think to study when you got home Kiba" Hinata speculated playing with her boyfriend's hair. Hinata was a fairly new addition to our group, when they had started dating she just sorta tagged along on most of outings until she became 'one of us'.

"It was late when I got home and you know it!" Kiba pouted and crossed his arms. Hinata blushed and hit him lightly and he grinned kissing her cheek. I cringed inwardly, the study group had left my house 9:30. What they had been doing for the rest of the night was not an image I wanted to have.

"Are we still on for tonight?" Ino said while toeing a sleeping Shikamaru, "Its girls pick tonight." Every week all of us(all of us being, Ino, Shikamaru, Choji, Kiba, Hinata, Sakura, and I) got together to watch a movie at someone's house. We even alternated who picked the movie every week by gender so it was fair. Lately I've been missing our weekly tradition to work for my god father, Jiraiya, at his café. I had had to ask for work off two weeks in advance in order for tonight to happen as planned.

Sakura yawned watching Lee run around basketball court by himself, "I got my mom to buy a bunch on snacks, and I have a couple cases of beer hidden under my bed."

"If there are snacks, then I'm still in," Choji chimed in.

Ino rolled her eyes at the boy, "Of course you are."

"I'm glad we are all going to be there this time, it's not the same without Naruto." Sakura smiled nudging me, "You always have to work. I don't see why you don't just move back in with your god parents."

"I like being independent, and I have to learn how to at some point." Which was true, "Plus they are crazy." That was also true. I loved my friends but they didn't understand my weird need to be independent. Luckily, my god parents did, and they had allowed me to move out when I turned 16. As long as they got to visit my apartment weekly to check up on me they pretty much stayed out of my personal business.

We all got up as the bell rang, waking up Shikamaru and walking down the steep bleachers and out of the gym into the freedom of the fresh autumn air, "When are you going to tell us about this mystery job of yours anyway Naruto?" Kiba questioned wrapping an arm around his girlfriend.

Oh, yeah. My other secret. It's not like it was even a _real_ secret. Just because I hadn't told them doesn't mean that they couldn't find out on their own. All they had to do is look up my god father on google and they'd find out that I worked at a maid/butler café that he owned downtown. No, it wasn't a huge deal, I wasn't a maid after all. I just helped out in the kitchen and I was actually getting pretty good at it. My god mother, Tsunade, had even suggested culinary school after highschool.

I was again brought back to reality as I bumped into Choji who had stopped walking. Looking up I met six pairs of curious eyes, "Naruto are you sure you're okay?" Sakura asked for the second time that day, she placed a hand of her hip and watched me warily.

"Yeah, why?"

"Your phone has been ringing back to back for the last couple of minutes." She said nodding at my jacket pocket which was buzzing loudly.

Oh. I guess I have been zoning out lately, but it's not like they could blame me. Fishing my phone out of my pocket I checked the caller ID. Work. Letting my shoulders slump in defeat I answered it, they wouldn't call me unless it was an emergency.

"Hello?" I asked turning away from my friend's gazes, "What is it?"

"Hey, Naruto I know you asked for the day off but Jiraiya said we needed you tonight because the restaurant is full and Naomi quit and..." I listened as Suigetsu rattled on and near the end started to tune him out. I got the gist of it. Tonight had to be cancelled.

"Of course, I'll be right there," I said not waiting for a reply as I hung up the phone. Cursing I turned back around to my friends, "I got to go guys, work emergency, I'll see you later? Maybe I can get off next week instead."

We said our goodbyes and I walked the rest of the way to my car by myself. Getting in I mentally prepared myself for work. It was always such a hassle.

SNSNSNSNSNS

Once there I parked my car around the back of the frilly café. I walked in and instantly knew why Jiraiya had needed me tonight. The usually quiet café was filled to the brim with customers and still had people waiting in lines. I cursed under my breath as I walked through the massive crowd, there must have been some sort stupid otaku convention. I let out an annoyed growl and went to go find Jiraiya.

When I finally found the pervert he was in the kitchen helping out by manning the omelet station. Seeing me walk in he breathed a sigh of relief "Naruto, finally," Jiraiya motioned someone else over to take care of the omelets while he took me by the elbow and led me to the locker room.

"I need you to fill in for Naomi, she quit on me today," Jiraiya said as I got dressed in my kitchen uniform.

"She probably was sick of you groping her-" I stopped mid-sentence as I registered what Jiraiya had said, "Naomi was a maid Jiraiya…" Taking a step back I put my hands up and shook my head vehemently, "I already told you I wasn't going out on the floor when I started working here Jiraiya! No way am I being a butler!"

Jiraiya sighed and held the bridge of his nose, "Good, we have enough butlers, and there mostly guys out there tonight anyway…"

I was confused at first _, if he doesn't want me to be a butler then what could I possible do on the floor tonight_ It couldn't be bartending because Suigetsu, Juugo, and Tsunade where the only ones who ever worked the bar. I felt the blood drain from my face as I realized what he was asking, _'we have enough butlers, and there are mostly guys out there…'_

"No." I deadpanned, "I don't even look like a girl! Why would you even suggest that? No, no, no no, and a thousand times no." I moved to leave the room to go help in the kitchen. In my mind this conversation was over – there was nothing more to talk about, I simply wouldn't do it. I may work in a maid café but I still had my pride.

"I'll give you a raise, double what you are making now," I stopped with my hand on the door, then I turned around slowly to look at my god father.

I didn't need the money. I got by with my rent and had the essential groceries, even if I did have to cut back on ramen, I really didn't need the money. I hardly ever got to go out, and I had survived this far without it. _I don't need it..._ _but I do want it..._

I sighed at what I was about to do, maybe I had dropped my pride the moment I walked into the stupid café, "Fine, but double my pay and I get one night of the week off with my usual pay," I negotiated, I knew asking for a day off with pay was pushing it, but I also knew Jiraiya would say yes. It had been a busy night. It was a pretty good deal considering it was only one time as a maid.

Jiraiya looked me over and smiled, "You have a deal my friend," He went into the supply closet and grabbed a black and white maid costume and blonde hair extensions. He then handed them to me and moved to leave to let me change, "I'll send Karin in to help you with your hair and makeup in 10 minutes" He winked and quickly left me standing in the middle of the empty locker room.

 _What the hell did I just get myself into?_ I don't know how, but I feel like I've been tricked. I once again looked in the mirror and cringed _, if I make it through this night without dying of embarrassment I'm going to kill Jiraiya_. He would have had to custom ordered this costume, which meant that he had eventually planned for me to be a maid.

I stared in the mirror and turned around once again to see the fox tail that was sewn into the back of the black and white maid outfit. Apart from the tail his uniform was completely different from the other girls.

The dress consisted of three separate pieces. The first was a white tuxedo blouse that buttoned up to the middle of my neck. It had bell sleeves that hugged my arms just until my wrist and only allowed for the tips of my fingers to be seen. Next was the skirt, it was also white with many layers so that it puffed up whilst the top layer was made of white silk. I had to tuck the shirt into the skirt and then put on the final piece which was a black corset that only came up to my chest, where, if I had actually been a girl, my breast would have been. It had a skirt attached to it that came down about two inches shorter that the white skirt and was only one layer; the fox tail was sewn to this part. The corset then came up and over his shoulders with frills. The outfit was completed with a set of fox ears and a black bow around my collar. I shuddered and tied the front of the corset just as Karin walked in.

She smiled at me and then laughed looking down at her simple black maid outfit and white apron, "Jiraiya sure got you this time Naru, but at least your outfit is better than ours."

I appraised myself once more in the mirror, Karin was right. While the other girls' costumes gave of a cutesy, girly vibe mine was more... elegant. I shuttered again cursing the pervert, "I don't care, and I'm going to kill him. Slowly."

Karin shook her head and chuckled moving the fox ears off of my head and began work on my hair. She expertly pinned the extensions in and then put my hair up in two twin pony tails. She then placed the ears back on my head.

"We aren't going to use much make up," She said coming around to see my face, "the whiskers add to the whole 'fox thing'" I felt relief until I saw the mischievous look on Karin's face, "You do however, want to shave your legs. Just up to you thighs of course."

SNSNSNSNSNS

I glared at Jiraiya and Karin as they smiled at me. I had protested and struggled at the mention of shaving my legs but it had all been futile. Jiraiya had asked Karin to go get Juugo, then Juugo came in and promptly held me down as Karin completed the tedious work of shaving me and putting white socks with ruffles around the ankle on me. They had then asked me kindly to put on my own high heels. Bastards.

"Can I go now? We do have a lot of customers tonight." I pouted, crossing my arms over my chest. Sure, I was being childish, but did I care? As long as the job got done he could act however I wanted.

Jiraiya frowned, "There's something missing…" He then smiled brightly and went back to the closet where he had originally got the costume from, "Ah! Here we go," he said excitedly.

I paled when I saw what Jiraiya had been searching for, in his hand there were two silicone boobs and a bra. Well, the bra was hanging off his wrist. He needed one hand each to hold the _huge_ fake breasts.

This time when Juugo was called in to hold me down he did so with a slight blush on his face.

When I was again fully dressed Jiraiya gave me a name tag to put on my newly acquired chest, "For appearances I changed your name to Naruko, make sure to answer to it and it should be fine,"

I shrugged in defeat, it didn't seem like a big deal after all the other things I was forced to endure. I pinned the tag to my newly acquired chest and sighed looking in the mirror. Nobody should be able to tell I was a guy, but it didn't stop me from worrying.

I turned and ignored Karin and Jiraiya's snickers as I headed outside to begin working. As the door closed behind me I heard Jiraiya say something along the lines of 'be nice'. Yeah, right.

SNSNSNSNSNS

"Welcome home, Masters! Please follow me to your seats," I greeted motioning to the rest of the room while flashing a bright smile at the two men who had just walked in. They seemed older, and not at all the type to come to a maid café. They were both kind of… intimidating. I shook off the uneasy feeling I got from the two and sat down my last customers for the night.

I had been working for about five hours and things were going surprisingly well. There had been an incident where someone had gotten a bit too handsy with me, but a quick intervention from Juugo cleaned that right up. I was surprised that no one realized that I was a man. I tried not to let that hurt my ego as I sat down the men.

"Here is our menu, Masters!" I smiled handing them two menus, "May I suggest the Maid Special Bubble Tea?"

"Yeah, and get us two of whatever you think is good," one of the men said grinning as he handed me back the menus, "and tell Suigetsu that his brother is here." The other man never even looked up from the table.

I was mildly surprised when the talkative man smiled, his teeth were sharpened to a point, just like Suigetsu's. Feeling restless and uncomfortable I smiled back and nodded, "Yes, Sir"

I headed back to the kitchen and got them two bubble teas and chicken curries then turned to Suigetsu who was drinking coffee and flirting with the girls, the lucky bastard. "A guy saying he is your brother is out there waiting for you," I told my co-worker.

"Kisame…" Suigetsu sighed, "I'll take them their orders; you should eat and pack up for the night, thanks for coming in… Naruko." Suigetsu smiled, laughing as he dodged the spatula I threw at him.

Sobering up Suigetsu picked up his brother's order and walked out of the kitchen brusquely.

Feeling pleased with myself for making it through the night, I made myself a parfait and walked out to the bar to sit down. Nodded as a greeting to Juugo I had just began to eat my sweet treat when I heard someone approaching me, "May I sit here?"

I swiveled around to look at the newcomer a tall man – boy, he was my age – with a stalk of red hair that was pulled back into a high ponytail. He was wearing all black in the form of a long sleeved t-shirt and jeans. He had his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans… which fit him extraordinarily well. I mentally shook myself and forced myself to look back at the boy's face, he was handsome, no doubt about it, by the way he carried himself he knew it too. The red headed man had apparently noticed my once over because he had a smirk plastered on his face. I blushed. Seeing Kurama always was a little treat for me.

Forgetting his attire I smiled at my friend whom also worked in the café, "I don't see why not," I watched as the boy silently hopped up on the stool next to me. I resumed eating my parfait and the boy ordered a bubble tea from Juugo.

"I never took you for a cross dresser _Naruko_."

I paled, I had completely forgotten what I was wearing. Kurama was the last person I would want to see me like this… well close to last. Even before I had 'discovered' myself he would flirt non-stop with me.

Kurama took my silence as permission to keep speaking, "I mean, I'm not judging, you just don't seem like the type of guy to like cross-dressing," a smirk, "although you are good at it… I bet nobody noticed" he didn't even try and hide the once over he gave me, "Not going to lie – you're hot, as a female and a male."

Color rushed to my cheeks as I registered what the other boy had just said to me, "I-I… Thank you?" Regaining his composure I continued, "You're right though, this wasn't by choice, we were short staffed" I looked away the blush still coloring my cheeks.

"Riiiight."

I felt the blush spread to my ears, "What are you even doing here? It's your day off."

"Jiraiya called and told me there was something I had to see."

I decided death was too good for Jiraiya, he needed to be hanged, drawn, and quartered. "Stupid old perverted man," I muttered under my breath.

"He was right, I _wouldn't_ want to miss this," I shuttered at the low tone Kurama's voice had taken, "You look so _cute_ when you blush like that Naruko."

"You're going to get your ass kicked" I threatened resisting the urge to tell Kurama about my sexual deviation. If I started something with him I didn't think I'd have the self-restraint to end it. Kurama was some sort of sex god. He was one of our butlers here at Doll Cafe and the girls always went gaga over him. I think it's the long hair. Usually stuff like that wouldn't look good on a guy, but Kurama seemed to pull it off perfectly. Even before Sasuke, I had had no problem admitting Kurama was attractive. Unfortunately for me the slightly older male though I was also attractive, this resulted in non-stop advances towards me. I had complained to Jiraiya once but apparently he was all for _Narama_ , the ship name our co-workers had given us.

"Naruto its closing time! Get out!" Jiraiya called as he walked out of the kitchen. Seeing Kurama he smiled, "I see you made it! I told you I could get him to wear it!"

 _...Wait what?_

I bristled as understanding washed over me. These two _idiots_ had planned this! They had probably ordered the damned costume together. Getting up from the stool I marched to the break room without saying a word to either of them, they probably would have just laughed at anything I had said. I felt disgusting. Cursing them I started to undress from the filthy costume as quickly as possible. It took me 20 minutes to get out of the costume. Then another 10 to get the 'little bit' of makeup Karin had put on my face. In the end it all added up to a terrible mood.

I growled a goodbye to Jiraiya who lived in an apartment above the café and exited through the back door. Sighing I pulled my hood up and started on the short walk to my apartment. I usually leave my car behind the café and walk back to collect it in the morning because it's safer. As I walked I thought back to my dilemma. I had really wanted to tell my friends tonight.

It wasn't like this was going to completely derail my plans. No, this was just a setback. I was definitely still going to tell them. It wasn't a matter of _if_ but _when_. I sighed for the umpteenth time tonight, it should be easier to tell all of them now that I had that one extra day per week to myself.

I was almost home when I heard it. Footsteps. Mentally cursing myself I forced myself to stay calm. I could take care of this. I walked for a while more making sure that the unknown person was actually following me. I turned a corner into an alleyway and quickly found a spot to hide in behind a dumpster. I listened to the footsteps stop and then cautiously follow me into the alley. Dammit. As the stalker passed me hiding spot I jumped up pulling both of us to the ground and then sat on the man's chest using one hand to his arms up besides his head.

I balled my fist up getting ready to make the first move when, the man spoke "Wait! Naruto!"

I quirked his head to the side, my fist still frozen in the air, "Kurama? What the fuck are you doing?"

Kurama smirked his red eyes flashing mischievously in the moonlight as he jerked his head flipping his hair out of his face, "Following you obviously," he said it like _I_ was the crazy one, "Will you get off of me now? I'm starting to lose the feeling in my arms, you definitely need to lay off the Very Berry Parfaits."

When I hesitated Kyuubi grunted and in a flash flipped us over so that I was underneath him and he was lying in between my legs. Our faces were inches apart. Ocean blue eyes met blood red ones and Kurama smirked his eyes moving down to my lips, "Yup, it's just as I thought," he looked back up into my eyes, "I prefer you as a man."

I shuddered, pushed Kyuubi off of me and moved away quickly narrowing my eyes, "Stop playing around Kurama, why were you following me?"

He began dusting the dirt off of himself, "I really just wanted to talk, but I decided to just follow you because it was more fun," he said chuckling.

I deadpanned, the stupid jerk had some balls. First making me wear that stupid _Naruko_ costume and then following me home. Did Naomi even quit? I had probably missed on one of the best opportunities to tell my friends about myself because of him and Jiraiya. I held back the tears I felt coming. I was not about to cry about my shitty day in front of this jerk. I was so done with all of bullshit that had been thrown at me today, "Well that's nice, hope you enjoyed your game. Goodbye." I turned around ready to walk away but stopped when I felt a hand on my wrist. I casually looked back at Kurama who was now up and standing directly behind me.

"Wait," Kurama met my eyes and then quickly looked away his hand still fiercely holding my wrist, "Can I stay with you tonight? I kinda don't have anywhere to go."

I blinked and turned around fully, no way was I about to let this creep into my home. He had already caused enough damage to my fragile psyche today, "What do you mean you don't have anywhere to go? _Go home_."

Kurama shrugged sheepishly, "My parents kicked me out about a month ago." He looked directly into my eyes again and stood up straighter, "I told them I was bisexual."

My eyes involuntarily widened and then I quickly regained my composure. I looked over Kurama and sighed, one day I'm going to stop being such a nice guy, "Fine," I growled, "but you sleep on the couch."

Kurama's face lit up instantly and he shot me a smile that caused the butterflies in my stomach to dance, "Sweet! Are you sure? Don't you have to clear it with your parents?"

I turned around and began to walk off, "No," I said over my shoulder, "They're dead."

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 **A/N: So I found this sitting on my laptop from like maybe 3-5 years ago and I decided to run with it haha (mostly because my account's non-activeness bothers me). Excuse it's crack-fic-ness, I am fully aware that it makes no sense to invite a creepy guy from work to spend the night at your house after he follows you to an alley. I was a weird 13-15 year old. Now that I think about it, I'm a weird 18 year old too. Oh well.**

 **Also this story won't be a priority, I'm currently writing two other stories and working with a beta on a third. I'll keep updating it but the updates won't be regular (I'm a college student - sue me. Actually don't. College loans are a bitch). Also, I quickly went through this and made it first person, so I'm sorry if there are any mistakes with POV. (It's also my first time even attempting first person. Idk if I like it yet) I'll try not to abandon this... it may take months for an update but it _will_ be updated, so please try and stay with me.**  
 **I'm human so there will be some mistakes. I'll try to fix them so feel free to point it out to me.**

 **Reviews may help with the updating process *Hint hint, wink wink, pointed stare* _constructive_ criticism welcome.**


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